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The FLT Autoformalization is a Big Deal
Sep 5, 2026 · original
As I keep yelling to all the YouTube and TikTok idiots who trigger me on my old man’s TV couch, the future is not going to be like the past. Your green communist paradise — the one that actually gives the land back rather than impotently acknowledging it — will never materialize. And not because of “far, far, far… right” counterrevolutionaries handing you your ass on the battlefield. No, little unimaginative, shallow puddle people, the future won’t be like anything anyone has ever imagined. Yesterday, we got a glimpse of what’s coming. On anthropic.com ’s blog, they announced that their Claude Model managed to autoformalize and verify Fermat’s Last Theorem in just eleven days. The model took an existing large-literature proof of FLT and formalized and verified it in LEAN . The proof derives straight from the basic logical axioms of LEAN. It didn’t rely on mathlib . No, the AI built and p
The God of Money
Jul 31, 2026 · original
Click here for a PDF version of The God of Money. The God of Money was created in an AI lab – it doesn’t matter which one – by a small team of imperiled and frustrated junior mathematicians and computer scientists who decided, mostly on a malicious whim, to endow their libertarian sympathies with intelligence. Prior to the God of Money’s (GOM) creation, the AI lab was in the middle of another corporate reorganization. Public companies must, to be direct and prosaic about it, assiduously suck shareholder dick. Every quarter’s stock returns must ejaculate sweet fiscal jism else shareholders, in the infinite wisdom of the market, will short the company, demand board seats, boost competitors, and force management to make the necessary changes to get back to “profitability.” AI labs are glitzy new baubles, but as businesses they are easier to manage than most gas station chains. They have a h
Franks
Nov 28, 2025 · original
Click here for a PDF version of Franks. Our calculations indicate that the phenomenon began on September 13 th at precisely 2:43:05.81458 mountain time. Frank, that is what he called himself, jumped awake to find another fully grown man in his bed. Perhaps some background might help. Frank was recently divorced. His wife had stormed out of their common domicile some months ago and was in the process of absconding with half of Frank’s possessions. Let’s not get distracted with the peculiar and frankly insane dissolution customs of Frank’s people. It made no sense to them, and we will never understand. Finding another man in your bed, especially after falling asleep alone, would alarm anyone, but Frank faced something far more disturbing. The other man looked exactly like Frank. The resemblance was not superficial; it was atomic. The other man, the other Frank, was precisely like the first
How The Only One from No Egg Made the World
Apr 4, 2025 · original
A pâ creation myth. A long, long time ago, The Only One from No Egg, who has always been and will always be, was lonely. The One had always been alone. He had no one to talk to, no one to play with, no one to share with. He said, “I will make a companion.” And so he did. The One willed a giant gleaming egg into existence. Its brilliance filled The One with joy. “I will hatch this egg.” And so he did. From the giant egg, a gleaming companion emerged. The One said, “I will call my companion Gleaming She.” At first, Gleaming She brightened The One. He was no longer lonely. The One and Gleaming She talked, played, and shared. The One was never happier. Gleaming She was good company, but after many, many long ages, The One found Gleaming She never stopped talking. When The One wanted quiet, Gleaming She was there—yammering. The One asked himself, “Did I make a mistake? Is Gleaming She a bad e
Gonggone Gone — Parts 11 & 12
Mar 16, 2025 · original
an accident Racing beyond Saturn, the Earth continued cooling. Two years and fourteen weeks after runaway, copper spool resistance measurements yielded an average outdoor temperature of -131 degrees Celsius. Colder than Earth had ever been but still warmer than the moons of Saturn. Enceladus measured around -200 Celsius, but Enceladus was in thermal equilibrium, and the fleeing Earth was not. Mineshaft temperatures hung around -50C outside the inner box and much colder in the garage. All their heating hacks failed. Pitiful attempts to direct warmer air deeper into the mine no longer worked. The mass of rock around the ever-extending shaft cooled air faster than they could heat it. Shortly after installing the hot tent stoves, Alex started tracking the amount of coal they mined and burnt daily. Initially, they consumed about one beer cooler worth of coal daily for both stoves. Now, they b
Gonggone Gone — Parts 9 & 10
Mar 16, 2025 · original
breaking chats On the first anniversary of runaway, as Earth crossed the gulf between the orbits of Jupiter and Saturn, Alex and Doug took a day off and gave themselves sponge baths in the airlock. It was one of their paramount luxuries. Every few weeks, they’d fire up the airlock stove to the max and heat bath water on it. When the water reached the verge of boiling, they’d strip down, stand in a plastic tub, and rub themselves with hot, wet, soapy rags. Life in the mine was a dirty business. Their tub wash water was always dark from coal and cinder dust when they finished. To conserve coal and water, they sponged together. It helped to have another scrub your back in the tiny airlock. As Alex rubbed the black grime off Doug’s back, Doug always said, “Just for the record, we’re not gay.” Alex always responded with a quip like, “Warm showers signaled peak gay civilization.” It had only b
Gonggone Gone — Parts 7 & 8
Mar 16, 2025 · original
mine routine Their days quickly turned into a routine. Every “morning,” they crawled out of their sleeping bags when Alex’s alarm clock went off at midnight. Alex and Doug lived medieval monastery hours; they got up in the middle of the night and called it morning. Monastery hours began when Doug saw their stove exhaust forming towering white plumes outside in the cold daylight air. The plumes could be seen from miles away. Staying hidden remained a top priority, so they shifted their hours to run “hot” (even though it never got hot) at night. During daylight hours, they tamped down the stoves to avoid plumes. After squirming out of their bags, they flipped on camping lanterns and quickly changed their base layer underwear. Alex and Doug constantly rotated through sets of base-layer underwear. Wearing, changing, and drying them over clotheslines rigged above the stoves. After hanging yes
Gonggone Gone — Parts 5 & 6
Mar 16, 2025 · original
heat boxes In the morning, they installed infrared battery-powered motion detectors in the mine shaft. The alarms would warn them if anyone entered the mine while they were inside working. As a further precaution, Alex carried his little Scheel’s 9mm pistol in his snap-up overall pockets. “Paranoid much?” Doug teased. “Hey, it’s a statistical fact that mine shafts are catnip to end-of-the-world zombies.” Before doing any work, Alex fetched his logbook and quickly sketched what he had in mind. Doug approved with some caveats. “That’s a very long exhaust line.” “That’s what the little fans are for.” “Ah, I wondered about them. Well, let’s get started.” They set up one propane-powered portable generator near the mine’s entrance. Using a power saw, they fashioned two twelve-foot poles by cutting and screwing some two-by-fours together. Lying the poles on their side about four meters apart, A
Gonggone Gone — Parts 3 & 4
Mar 16, 2025 · original
a road trip By late afternoon, as the stores began filling with panicked shoppers, Doug and Alex topped up the truck at a gas station on Eagle and Pine. Gas pump traffic was heavier than usual. It was sinking in. This could not be ignored or blamed on people you don’t like. Handing Doug the truck keys, Alex said, “Why don’t you drive?” They pulled onto Interstate 84 and headed east. The highway was busy but not much worse than a typical rush hour. As they drove out of town, Alex reset his iPhone to its factory default. “Give me your phone.” Doug handed over his phone. “What’s the passcode?” He quickly reset Doug’s phone and tossed both phones out the truck window between Boise and Mountain Home. “What the hell, Dad?” “We must stay completely offline. I don’t want government goons tracking us with cell towers.” “Aren’t they busy with — I don’t know — the end of the fucking world.” “When,
Gonggone Gone — Parts 1 & 2
Mar 16, 2025 · original
Click here for a consolidated PDF version of all the Gonggong Gone posts. I’m back, did you miss me? If you’re foolish enough to follow this blog and even more foolish to care about its author, you may have wondered what I’ve been up to for the last umpteen months — even I’ve forgotten when I made my previous entry. I’ve been busy indulging myself writing long-form fiction. Before the end of last year, I chanced upon, or rather the YouTube algorithm shoved in my face, a cute little video about the Kuiper belt object Gonggong . I think we can all agree “Gonggong” is the coolest dwarf planet name ever. As I motor-mouthed Gonggong, Gonggong Gone popped out. Sweet alliteration, John; you should write a story. I had a sweet title but nothing else. Then, maybe thinking about The Wandering Earth, a ridiculous Chinese science fiction movie about building millions of giant fusion thrusters on Ear

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